Entering into November and the weather is still delightfully beautiful. Last night was the kind of evening where you just have to go outside and breathe deeply. Luckily I could take some time to appreciate all that is wonderful in my life. I am in such a great place, with so many blessings--in fact, most of my problems are from having too much instead of too little. And so I am trying to cleanse, clear out the junk--in my diet, in my closet, in my head.
My husband started a new job a few months ago, and while it has resulted in a (mostly) better work/life balance for him, it has been a bit of a jolt for me. New coworkers, new patterns, new experiences...for my husband. It has brought out a lot of crazy insecurities, highlighting some of my childhood baggage (my 'daddy issues' if you will, from my father leaving my mother for another woman...right around 16 years of marriage and 'midlife').
Sometimes I just can't control the fear that the same thing will happen to me. Parts of the past few weeks I have felt like I'm losing it. But every now and again I can stop twisting every comment, or situation, or sneaking suspicion into the worst scenario...and see the best in my life, myself, my husband...and realize it is all so good. Especially when I allow it to be.
Black and White Wednesday